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      Осторожно, злой ребёнок!

      Отношение • Развитие

      Вот перед вами ваш милый малыш, улыбчивый и дружелюбный и, вдруг – дома, в кафе, на прогулке ли – он превращается в Халка и начинает крушить, кричать, кидаться всем, что видит, в вас или детей на игровой площадке, дерётся… Вы недоумеваете, что же произошло и пытаетесь его урезонить, нервно улыбаясь проходящим мимо людям, мол, ничего, всё в порядке, малыш шутит. И действительно ничего страшного, если это случилось один раз, куда хуже, если такое поведение повторяется изо дня в день.

      Почему в крохотных созданиях так много агрессии?

      В каждой ситуации стоит разбираться особенно, но есть пять типичных случаев, когда ребёнок:

      1. Больше не чувствует себя малышом, с которым надо сюсюкаться. Но родители не замечают этого и ведут себя по-прежнему, что вызывает закономерный протест у ребёнка. “Я больше не милый пупсик!” — отчаянно сообщает вам ваш малыш, бросаясь песком в окружающих.
      2. Не знает, куда деть свою энергию. Дети с сильным темпераментом неутомимы, они настоящие марафонцы, для которых не подходят обычные режимы сна и отдыха. Они готовы долго и с энтузиазмом играть, веселиться, бегать, рисовать, слушать сказки перед сном до самого утра. Причина агрессии неутомимого малыша в том, что ему нужен совсем другой образ жизни.
      3. Плохо себя чувствует и пытается сообщить об этом, как умеет. Пока малыш не умеет посетовать, что у него болит голова от солнца, не может пожаловаться, что его укачивает в машине каждый раз по дороге в садик, не знает, как сказать, что ему грустно из-за проблем в жизни свинки Пеппы — он будет упрямиться, кричать, топать ногами и обзываться. Такой вот у детей способ дать знать о своих проблемах.
      4. Хочет быть главным. Часто так происходит, когда родители тайно или открыто конфликтуют и малыш хочет это прекратить, просто приказав ссориться. “Я глава семьи и я хочу, чтобы вы обнялись” — намекает ребёнок, кусаясь и щипая вас за ноги.
      5. Хочет тепла и понимания. Малыш может принести из семьи в детский сад не только любимые игрушки, но и взрослые негативные эмоции, ожидания, страхи. Агрессия по отношению к сверстникам чаще всего является желанием избавиться от неприятного и пугающего напряжения.

      Что же делать родителям?

      Не стоит сразу же бросаться запрещать или подавлять проявление злости. Для начала стоит самостоятельно или с психологом разобраться, в чём причина такой агрессии.

      Чаще всего, ответ на поверхности и вместо того чтобы наказывать ребенка, загоняя в замкнутый круг страданий, мы должны его выслушать, пожалеть, обнять и успокоить. Нет, приступы агрессии не пройдут после первого же успешного разговора, малыш может и дальше недоверчиво испытывать ваши нервы на прочность по разным мелким поводам. Если вы не хотите, чтобы злоба стала нормой самовыражения (а вы, конечно же, не хотите этого, если только вы не суровый викинг), то поймайте дзен, успокойтесь и терпеливо слушайте, замечайте, разговаривайте – выясняйте, в чём проблема. Со временем, малыш увидит, что совсем необязательно кричать и топать, чтобы донести до вас свою точку зрения.

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